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How to support those with neurodiversity at Christmas

Getty Images A young boy wearing blue pyjamas standing to the left of the photo. He is reaching up and touching his headphones while looking at the Christmas tree in front of him, which is lit up with gold lights and green baubles. Behind him is a dining table and a green garland resting on the windowsill. Getty Images
Colourful decorations, bright lights and crowded gatherings can be overstimulating for neurodivergent people

An autism charity has shared it's top tips on helping neurodivergent people enjoy Christmas in their own way.

Bristol Autism Support (BAS) said it is important to be "flexible and adaptable" by understanding people's individual needs and making accommodations to meet them.

The festive season can often be overstimulating for neurodivergent people due to colourful decorations, bright lights, strong scents, loud music, crowded gatherings and unfamiliar food.

Louise Mills, operations manager at BAS, said: "Whilst this brings joy to many of us, it will also be challenging and overwhelming for some neurodivergent people."

Bristol Autism Support A graphic showing a group of people sitting around a table, eating Christmas dinner and drinking. Around the drawing are suggestions of how to help prepare for social gatherings, including role-playing greetings and small talk, letting them bring a familiar item for comfort, and taking breaks when needed.Bristol Autism Support
The charity has offered advice on how to prepare neurodivergent people for social gatherings during the festive period

Christmas brings change to usual routines and activities, and for many neurodivergent people, this can lead to uncertainty and anxiety.

In addition, the daily struggles neurodivergent people face, with regards to attention difficulties, impulsivity and organisation, can become amplified.

Dr Hollie Hearfield, a consultant psychiatrist and ADHD specialist, said it is vital to remember that neurodiversity looks different for everyone.

"We shouldn't really make any presumptions about how to support anybody," she said.

"At this time of year, a lot of neurodivergent people will just be tolerating certain things, and you won't know if they're struggling with it or not.

"So the best thing to do is just ask them, and when they tell you, you need to believe them."

Bristol Autism Support A side by side graphic showing an overwhelming sensory environment on the left, versus a sensory-friendly environment on the right. On the left are drawings of candles, itchy Christmas jumpers, bright lights and patterned stockings and baubles. On the right there is a comfy chair, dull yellow lights, noise cancelling headphones and a pile of comfortable clothes. Bristol Autism Support
Familiar food, noise-cancelling headphones and comfortable clothing can make for a sensory-friendly environment

Ms Mills said it is easy to get "caught up in social expectations" at this time of year, and feel pressured into participating in conventional celebrations.

"Just remember the most important thing is to enjoy the season, and sometimes, that means doing things a little differently," she said.

Sapna Boden, from Bristol, has a nine-year-old son with autism who "hates Father Christmas" and finds the festive season overwhelming.

She says balancing his needs with those of her neurotypical daughter can often be difficult to navigate, but as an autistic person herself, she understands his triggers.

Family Handout Sapna Boden with her two young children. She has long dark hair with a fringe, dark eyes and is wearing a blue jumper. Her head is titled towards her daughter on the right, and her son is on the left. They are all smiling at the camera and sitting in front of a bright window. Family Handout
Ms Boden makes provisions for her son to feel more comfortable in social settings

"If he doesn't like his Christmas present he will blatantly say to you 'I didn't want this'," she said.

"He's not being fussy, he's not being rude or controlling, it really does affect his internal sensory system.

"Don't take offence if he doesn't like your gift or wish you a Merry Christmas, he's just not aware of it. When he's in his zone, he's in his zone."

Ms Boden said in addition to recognising when a person is dysregulated and allowing them space to decompress, it can can help to put comforting measures in place.

She suggested serving familiar foods, discussing plans beforehand, and designating a quiet room to serve as a calming refuge.

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